I wanted to write about this because this is something I have struggled with over the years however I have learnt that if I didn’t make a change nothing will change.
Sometimes it is hard to admit it how we feeling or if we struggling because we can't talk about how we feel.
It’s was in February 2018, what a year 2017 was. Or should I say how hard and challenging my life had been.
My sister got diagnosed with stage 4 cancer and my ex got married that same week.
I had to take on caring for my sister whilst running her business, planning her wedding as she was also getting married and continue to still be a mum. I pushed through and but my body completely crashed... I landed up in hospital on Valentine’s Day, I will never forget this and the fact that this happened on Valentine’s Day was a real confirmation moment for me that I needed to start loving me again and taking care of me.
We had gone out for lunch with some friends and when we returned I didn’t feel well and I suffer really bad with migraines so I thought it was a migraine coming on but I didn’t feel well at all. My heart was racing and I was just felt completely burnt out. My dad took me straight to hospital. I was seen straight away and given an electrocardiogram (ECG) and monitored for hours and then I was told I had Atrial fibrillation and I would have to have an electric shock to restore the normal rhythm of the heart. After spending the night in hospital and having lots of tests done and medication my heart restored itself and I was able to return home.... thank goodness I didn't have to experience the electric shock. I was signed off work till April and put on beta blockers and told I had to take it easy and really take it easy. For days and weeks after I struggled as I felt so weak.
I have always loved to help every person I can and I would always put myself before any one else. I have forgot about myself.
This was a HUGE wake up call that I needed to start taking care of me and looking after myself but I honestly didn’t know where to begin, my self worth and confidence was at its absolute lowest I just had enough of all the struggles we had been through but I had to push through, I had to for me and for Sophie.
In this time I really used my faith as a real strength, my sister had signed me up to a local Spa/Gym. I cut back what I was saying yes to and I focused more and more on me... it’s been a long 2 year healing journey for me and the time has been so up and down but I have got through it and now I know when my body has over done it and I recognise where I need to put myself first. Don’t get me wrong, I get bad days, sometimes things with Sophie’s dad are challenging but I have learnt that I am number 1 and I need to take care of me first before any one else because if I don’t care for me how I am going to take care and be the best mum to Sophie?
I wanted to call blog this YOU, even though I have spoken about my experience. If you have experienced something like this or if you struggling it’s ok to say to say you are. The world we live in hard and the current situation we are facing are tough and if we not taking care of ourselves we will fall apart, taking care of our minds too. The words we use the stuff we think. My sister will often pick me up on this.
I have learnt is that self care and self talk is vital in our lives it encourages us to maintain a healthy relationship with ourselves so that we can transmit good feelings to others.
Self care and self talk teaches us a lot about ourselves and provides us with insight into what we need to be the best version of ourselves.
It helps you cope better with stress and to prioritise what's important to you.
You will be better to take care of others when you also take time to meet your own needs first.
Something which I have used to help stay on track is a Habit tracker to make sure each day I was sticking to make me a priority. To download yours Click Here
Please don’t keep everything bottled up, don’t try be a super hero and try do everything alone. Ask and reach out for help, talk and take care of YOU.
Until next time x
*Quote from https://www.instagram.com/kianaazizian/